Gnis Gnat

This always happens to me. Somebody at the office gives me a present just out of the blue.

It's always somebody who you just figure isn't going to give you a present. You know, like somebody you've repeatedly insulted in meetings over the course of the year.

And it happened again this year. Present. Out of the blue. And I don't mean a second-hand fruitcake. This is an obviously hand-glittered pear ornament. It's stunning. It looks like something Elton John would hang from his rear-view mirror.

A note on fruitcake: People always give me and Jeffrey their fruitcakes. We're the only ones who like the stuff. It's kind of a competition to see who can get the most. I was up to five, I think, but then Jeffrey used deceipt and subtle psychological warfare to hijack some fruitcakes that were destined for my office.

Speaking of warfare, Jeffrey's workstation is under gnat attack. Well, he's got some kind of a jungle over there at his cube. It was only a matter of time before it became a full-fledged habitat for the wandering fauna of Berkeley.

Something about this rain we've been having really seems to bring out the gnats.

He's using sand to keep the gnat population down.

Anyway, presents. Jeffrey helped me haul some Champagne to the office so I can balance out my gift deficit, but hardly anybody showed up for work today! It's good Champagne too.

Well, I guess it's mimosas and fruitcake tomorrow morning then.

Kurt "big daddy" True
22 december 2005